Prank War
by Avengerlicious
Summary: Tony and Loki are pranking geniuses. But when they are pitted against eachother, chaos is brought forth. Crackfic! No Slash. Do not need to be read sequentially.
1. Faking Dating

**A/N**

**Hey everybody! Well, since it's my birthday, I thought I'd publish a new story. So if you like it, please review!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers. **

* * *

Loki sat on the couch in the penthouse of Stark Tower, gazing out at the view of New York. He heard Tony's unmistakable footsteps.

"Stark, you and Pepper are solid, yes?" he asked, not looking away from the city.

"Yes..." Tony said cautiously. "Why?"

"Nothing. Just making small talk."

"You hate small talk."

Loki stood up and strode to his bedroom, ignoring Tony's remark.

Loki sat on his bed, laptop in lap. He entered Google Chrome internet browser and went to the eHarmony website. He clicked the 'Create a profile' button.

Loki eyed each question.

Name? Anthony Edward Stark

Age? 41

Gender? Male

Interested in? Females

Likes? Computers, my suits, shawarma

Dislikes? Being handed things, cooking and terrorists

Favorite colour? Red

Loki smiled evilly after pressing the 'save' button.

* * *

_Later that day..._

Loki logged onto eHarmony. There had been 23 matches and 95737 people interested, which was remarkable for only the first two hours. He logged off just as Pepper stormed into the living room.

She walked up to Tony and held up a printout of a page. "What the hell, Tony?!" she screamed. "Why on earth are you using a dating website?!"

Loki conjured a bowl of popcorn and sat on the couch to view the argument.

"I have never seen that in my life." he stammered as he gestured to the piece of paper.

"Don't lie to me Tony!"

Tony glanced in Loki's direction and caught sight of the trickster god eating popcorn with an evil grin plastered on his face.

"You." Tony murmured.

"What?" Loki asked innocently.

"You." Tony hissed again, a spark of rage flashing in his eyes.

Loki casually stood before making a wild run for it out to the balcony. He stopped on the edge and Tony launched himself at him. Tony went right through Loki and fell toward the busy streets of New York City. Loki removed his clone and smirked at the sight of the Mark 42 suit shooting out of the building.

* * *

**A/N**

**I hope you enjoyed this first little chapter of the Prank War! I also know nothing about eHarmony or any dating website for that matter so forgive me if the details are wrong. Please review and requests are encouraged!**


	2. Little God of Mischief

**A/N**

**Hey guys! I am absolutely ecstatic with the amount of views, reviews, follows, and favorites after just the first chapter! Thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favorited and followed.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers.**

* * *

Tony just finished tightening the last screw on his newest invention. It was shaped like a gun but looked pretty retro. He grabbed Pepper's last Christmas present, a giant bunny that read 'Merry Christmas Pepper', and set it at the back of the lab. He shoved some safety goggles onto his face and pointed the gun at the bunny. He pulled the trigger which caused the gun to release a ray of white light. A puff of blue smoke surrounded the bunny before revealing a small bunny, identical to the larger one.

Tony, feeling proud of himself, marched up to the penthouse to show off his invention.

"Everybody, I have successfully created the coolest thing ever!" he announced as he emerged from the elevator.

"What is it?" Natasha asked curiously.

"Allow me to demonstrate. I need a volunteer. Loki?"

"No thanks." the god of mischief said, backing away from Tony.

It was too late. Tony had already pointed the gun at the trickster and pulled the trigger. The same white light shot out of the gun and encased Loki in smoke. Once the smoke had cleared, Loki was still there, only a lot smaller than he was before. I'm talking action figure size.

Natasha's jaw dropped, Loki's eyes filled with tears and Tony's face had the biggest grin plastered on it.

"I hope that answers your question, my dear Natasha." Tony exclaimed.

"Wha- what have you done to me?" Loki stuttered.

Pepper had just walked into the room. "Tony, I need you to sign- What happened to Loki?!" she gasped. "Tony, why do you have a retro gun in your hand?"

"Nice to see you too, Pep. This-" Tony held up the gun, "-is my newest invention. A shrink ray!" he bragged.

"Why did you turn Loki into a… a… a mini Loki?"

"Remember that stunt he pulled with the online dating website?"

Pepper nodded slowly.

"Well, this is phase one of revenge." Tony smirked.

"There- there's more?" Loki cried.

Tony nodded eagerly.

Loki suddenly felt his nose tingle signalling a sneeze coming on. Sure enough, Loki sneezed. He had returned to normal size and smirked at Tony.

"Damn." Tony muttered before throwing his shrink ray off the balcony.

* * *

**A/N**

**Did you like it? Did ya? Did ya? Tell me in a review! Requests are always elcome! **


	3. My Little Tony

**A/N**

**Wow, I am loving how so many people enjoy this story! I am really sorry for the double post of the previous chapter. I didn't actually realise it until I received reviews telling me. So here it is, the actual My Little Tony. :)  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers, sadly. But a girl can dream, right?**

* * *

Loki tiptoed into Tony's bedroom, but not before disabling Jarvis. He touched Tony's arm.

* * *

_Tony's P.O.V._

I awoke fairly early, but I dragged myself out of bed for a cup of coffee. When I opened my bedroom door, I was taken aback by the sight of Ponyville. I rubbed my eyes. I could still see Ponyville. _This is _not _happening_. _I haven't dreamt about My Little Pony since I was 7. _I slowly stepped out of my room. I observed the scene, noticing all the ponies staring at me. I looked at myself. _Good. I am still human. _

A purple unicorn trotted past me, whistling a tune that seemed familiar. The pony returned and stood in front of me, her eyes widened in awe.

"You're a human!" she finally exclaimed. "I've read about your species in mythology. It's so amazing to actually see one. Oh my, I have to tell Princess Celestia!"

I stared at the pony. She bent and pointed her horn at me and muttered a few words.

The next thing I knew, I was a pale pink pegasus with a bright pink mane and tail.

"What have you done to me?" I asked as I surveyed my body.

The unicorn ignored me and trotted to what I assumed was her home.

I was suddenly knocked over by a blue pegasus with a rainbow mane and tail and a cloud and rainbow cutie mark.

"Sorry! Hey, you're new here, aren't you?" I nodded.

"I'm Rainbow Dash. Say, do you want to race me."

Before I could answer, I was being dragged to the race track.

"One, two, three, go!" Rainbow yelled before I could process what was happening. I immediately started sprinting when I crashed into the stands.

* * *

Tony's eyes shot open to the sight of Loki touching his arm.

"What the hell, Loki?!"

Loki just smirked after pulling his arm away from Tony.

"Did you manipulate my dream?!"

"Have you ever heard of revenge, Stark?"

"But I haven't carried out full vengeance on you yet!" Tony whined.

"Deal with it." Loki hissed before leaving the room.

* * *

**A/N**

**Okay, I know what you're thinking. This one was pretty lame. I promise the next one will be better. Please review!**


	4. Sneezing Switches

**A/N**

**I hope you like this one! This was inspired by a game of would you rather I played with my best friend the other day. It was 'Would you rather sweat mayonnaise or change sex every time you sneeze?'**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers!**

* * *

_Finished, _Tony thought proudly. He poured the powder into a small jar. _This will have Loki in sneezing fits in no time._ Tony ran up to the penthouse and found said trickster god lounging on the couch, book in hand. Tony walked past him, acting nonchalant. He deliberately tripped, the powder spilling onto Loki's book.

"Oops, sorry." Tony smiled innocently.

Loki dusted the powder off the book, accidentally inhaling a bit. "Ah… ah… choo!" Loki sneezed. Tony had turned away during the sneeze. When he spun back around, he didn't see Loki. He saw a woman with similar features to Loki.

"What. the. hell?" Tony muttered.

"What?" Loki asked. When he noticed the change of pitch in his voice, Loki studied his body.

"What have you done to me?" Loki cried.

"It was meant to be regular sneezing powder! It must have some weird effect on gods." Tony defended.

Just then, Thor strode into the room, looking for his pop tarts. He had left them on the coffee table. Thor grabbed the plate, which, unfortunately for him, had some powder on it. "Ah… ah… choo!" Thor sneezed loudly. He too had transformed into a woman with Thor's features.

"Excuse me." Thor apologised. "Why do I sound like a lady? Why do I look like a lady? Loki, what have you- why are you a lady?!"

Loki had once again inhaled the powder, triggering another sneeze. He had changed back to his male self.

Loki smirked in Tony's direction. Thor, who instantly despised his female figure, willingly inhaled more powder to change back to a male.

Loki clenched his fist, causing the powder to disappear.

"Hey!" Tony whined.

Tony stomped back down to the lab, hiding his mischievous grin. He had previously saved a jar of that sneezing powder in the lab. Tony had new plans since he discovered the effect of sneezing powder on demigods and frost giants. Tony poured half of the jar into a small bag.

Tony snuck into Loki's room and pried open the entrance into the air vent. He set up a small, silent fan that ran on batteries at the edge of the vent. He opened the bag and left it in front of the fan. Tony carefully shut the vent and ran out of the room.

* * *

_Later that evening…_

Loki entered his bedroom, seeking a few hours of sleep. He lied on his bed, almost instantly falling asleep. Tony had spied using the secret cameras he had built into all the bedrooms. He activated the silent fan via remote.

* * *

Loki stumbled into the penthouse, sneezing nonstop, because the powder had gone up his nasal passage, and constantly switching genders.

"St-" he paused to sneeze and change to a man, "-ark!"

Tony instantly stood to run and Loki couldn't exactly chase after him given that he had to shut his eyes for a sneeze every two seconds. Instead, Loki cast a spell on Tony, changing said genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist into a woman himself.

"Hey!" Tony whined.

Unfortunately for Loki, Pepper had walked in on him changing Tony.

"Loki! What have you done to Tony?! Change him back, NOW!" she screamed at the sight of her boyfriend as a female.

Loki, of course, had refused to change him back, provoking Pepper to tackle him and pull his hair. Pepper was lying on top of the god of mischief, tugging on the hair of both a female and male as he was constantly sneezing and changing.

"Mercy! Mercy!" Loki squealed, turning Tony back into his male form.

Pepper stood up, brushed herself off and straightened her clothing. She spun her heels and walked out of the room as if nothing had happened.

* * *

**A/N**

**Hope you liked it! Please review!**


	5. Toad Sandwich

**A/N**

**Here it is! Loki's revenge for revenge for revenge. This was inspired by smarty-wanna-party. :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers, I never will own the Avengers. I might own Avenger action figures ;)**

* * *

Stark was lounging on the couch, television remote in one hand, and a delicious sandwich in the other.

Tony flipped through channels, searching for something good to watch when he came across a documentary on him. He paused for a moment, staring at the screen. _How did people know what went on in the tower? _he asked himself as the footage of him turning into a woman appeared on the screen.

The lights in the tower suddenly started flashing on and off. Stark, ignoring the lights took his first bite out of the sandwich.

"Wow, Pepper, this is delicious!" he called out to her.

He took a larger, more eager bite out of it.

Loki, who was hiding behind the couch, had a little trick up his sleeve.

Tony was slowly chewing the bite, savouring every last bit of it. The taste suddenly became dreadful. Tony spat the sandwich out. Only, it wasn't a sandwich anymore. It was a chewed up toad.

"Ew, gross, gross, gross!"

Pepper walked into the room. "Don't you dare disrespect my cooking!"

Tony continued to spit in an attempt to rid his mouth of the awful taste. Pepper glared at him until he managed to explain to her that there was a toad in his mouth.

Tony could here hysterical laughter coming from behind the couch. Sure enough, Loki was rolling around in hysterics.

"The hell?!" Tony yelled at him.

"Huh?" Loki managed to say in between giggles.

"Why would you ruin this sandwich for me?"

"It's called revenge, look it up!" Loki retorted.

"What for?"

"The sneezing powder."

"You can't get revenge for revenge!"

"I can and I did!"

Loki stalked out of the room with a grin, leaving Tony standing in dismay.

* * *

**A/N**

**Hope you liked it. Please leave a review! If anybody has any ideas, please let me know. I supply is very low at the moment!**


	6. Upside Down

**A/N**

**Enjoy this little chappie! Inspired by my friend Samara.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers... :(**

* * *

Tony strode into his lab, his thoughts who knows where. He was carrying a cup of coffee and was whistling the tune of 'Back in Black' by AC/DC.

He was walking when he tripped over a light. Yes, a light. He lurched forward, his coffee spilling into an air vent. He snapped out of his thoughts and studied the room. Either he somehow gained abilities to walk on walls or the room was upside down.

Tony shut his eyes and shook his head violently. He opened his eyes and found that he was still standing on the ceiling. _Damn._

He walked out of the lab and up to the living room. It of course, was the right way up. He suddenly heard a scream come from his bedroom. I unconsciously ran there to find Pepper… standing on the ceiling. The other Avengers had reacted to the scream the same way as Tony and made their way to his bedroom.

"Why is your bedroom upside down Tony?" Pepper asked cautiously.

Natasha and Clint walked around the room to investigate when their eyes landed on Thor who was shaking his head.

"What's wrong Thor?" Steve asked.

This is the work of Loki." he said slowly.

Tony's face turned to the colour of Natasha's hair. He ran out of the room yelling "LOKI!"

Loki, hearing Tony's wrath, quickly made an illusion of himself before hiding behind the couch.

"LOKI!" Tony screamed once more, launching himself at the illusion. As expected, Tony fell right through Loki's illusion and collided with the couch. You could say he was seeing stars and stripes. He slowly stood up, rubbing his head.

Loki's hysterics were heard from his hiding spot. Tony smiled evilly and tiptoed to the other side of the couch and jumped on top of the trickster god. A soft crack was heard and Tony smiled smugly. He forced more weight onto Loki.

"If you want me to stop then you'll turn my lab and bedroom back to normal." Tony said in a freakishly calm tone.

Loki managed to pull his arm out from underneath Tony. His slightly moved his wrist, turning everything the right way up.

"Now was that so hard?" Tony asked in a mocking tone.

Loki scowled.

* * *

**A/N**

**I hope you liked it! Review for a virtual pop tart! :D**


	7. A Stark Makeover

**A/N**

**Hey y'all! This was inspired by A fixed broker (guest). I hope you enjoy it!**

**Disclaimer: I think if I owned the Avengers I would be writing a script for the next movie, not a story for fan fiction.**

* * *

_That's it Loki. Stay still. _Tony thought wickedly. He snuck up behind Loki, who was reading a book on the couch, and stabbed a tranquiliser dart into his neck. Loki's neck suddenly slung over to the side and his book dropped to the floor. Tony picked up the unconscious trickster and lugged him over to Loki's bedroom. Tony released Loki onto his bed. He grabbed a pair of scissors and grinned mischievously. He started snipping away at Loki's long, lush hair.

Soon enough, Loki's hair looked exactly like Tony's. Tony beamed at his handiwork. He then grabbed a fake goatee to stick on Loki's clean shaven face.

Tony took out his phone and snapped a photo of Loki.

Tony disposed of Loki's cut off hair and tiptoed off to the living room.

* * *

Loki awoke in his bedroom. He looked outside and saw that it was evening. He couldn't remember how he got to his bedroom or that he fell asleep in the first place. Loki started toward the living room where he found the others laughing at Thor who was complaining about the orange juice in his eye. They stopped making fun of Thor when they saw Loki walk in. Tony rolled on the floor in hysterics. Loki just stared at them with a puzzled expression.

"Brother! I had known not that you were one for Stark's look." Thor bellowed

Loki's confused expression remained until he finally understood Thor's comment.

He ran to the nearest mirror. Loki screamed in disgust when he saw his reflection. He ripped off the fake goatee.

"STARK!" he yelled furiously.

"See ya!" Tony said quickly before bolting out onto the balcony. He summoned his suit and was soon hovering next to the tower.

From inside his suit, Tony projected the photo of Loki on the large electronic billboard in the middle of the city. Loki blushed a bright shade of red before grabbing his scepter and shooting energy wildly at Tony. Tony did his best to dodge the shots until the team tackled the infuriated god of mischief.

* * *

**A/N**

**I hope you liked it!**

**Roses are red, FanFiction is blue, I worked really hard so please review! :)**


	8. Surprise in a Cup

**A/N**

**Okay, first, this chapter was inspired by Rascal (guest). Second, I'm sorry it is so short. And third, I am not entirely happy with this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers.**

* * *

Fortunately, Asgardians' hair can grow very fast and Loki's hair was almost back to normal.

He smirked as he watched Tony pouring himself a scotch. Just as Tony put the cup to his lips, bugs and snakes replaced the liquid. Tony didn't notice until he felt a snakes tongue brush across his lips. He screamed and dropped the cup. Tony leapt onto the counter. He spotted Loki smirking.

"What the hell is it with you ruining my food and drinks?!" he screamed.

"What is it with you making me look ridiculous?" he retorted.

Loki twisted his hand, the bugs and snakes disappearing.

Natasha walked in and gave Stark a weird look when she saw him on the counter. She went to pour herself some orange juice. Loki did the same to her drinks. When Natasha realised the bugs, she threw the cup at Loki. She launched herself him. Loki chuckled from the other side of the room. Natasha flew right through his illusion. He was standing beneath an air vent and Clint dropped right on top of him. Loki screamed out of surprise before Clint hit him on the head with his bow. Loki dropped to the floor.

* * *

**A/N**

**Please Review!**


	9. I Love Thor!

**A/N**

**Hope you like it! I think I'm losing my funny touch, though. Oh, and this was inspired by Rascal (guest).**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers.**

* * *

"Aaaaah!" Loki screamed. The sight of his closet was horrendous. His usual Asgardian garb was nowhere to be found. Instead, t-shirts, jumpers and hats with phrases such as "I Love Thor" or "Thor is #1" or even pictures of his brother plagued his wardrobe.

"What is this obscenity?" Loki asked himself in disgust. He immediately thought that his brother was to blame.

"Thor!" Loki yelled angrily. Thor pranced into Loki's room and found his brother bubbling over in rage.

"What is it brother?" Thor asked. He then noticed his brother's new clothing. "Brother! I had no idea you loved me so much!" Thor exclaimed excitedly.

"Don't play dumb, Thor. I know you did this." Loki hissed.

"I have done no such thing."

A thought popped into his head. "_Stark_" he muttered.

Loki grabbed his sceptre from underneath his bed and marched into the living room with a frolicking Thor following.

Tony was sitting on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table and Pepper by his side.

"Stark!" Loki pointed his sceptre in Tony's direction.

The pair turned to see the furious Frost Giant.

"Oh my god! Loki! Put that down before somebody gets hurt!" Pepper squealed.

"That is my intention, Lady Potts." Loki said evilly as he slowly approached Tony. No matter how much Pepper protested, Loki continued. She had no choice but to grab a frying pan and whack the god in the head. Loki dropped.

"Oh my god, that was really violent." she whispered.

* * *

**A/N**

**Review if you wish to be safe from Loki's sceptre or Pepper's frying pan. :)**


	10. What reeks?

**A/N**

**I know I'm a bit slow with updates, and I'm sorry about that.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers...**

* * *

"Romanoff, duck!" Steve yelled out. Black Widow ducked and swung a kick at the attacker. Captain America threw his shield at a group of men. Thor summoned lightening at them and Tony aimed his famous repulsor rays at them. Loki shot energy and Hawkeye shot arrows.

Once the terrorist group had been dealt with, the Avengers sprawled across the ground. Tony' suit disassembled. The whole group backed quickly away from him. A horrible stench floated out of his suit.

"What reeks?!" Clint exclaimed, pinching his nose.

Tony inhaled some air and gagged. "Ugh. It smells like mayonnaise!"

Everyone took a whiff.

Natasha pinched her nose. "And it's coming from you!" she exclaimed.

"What? Ugh, why is my sweat white?"

"Dude, you're sweating mayonnaise!" Clint hi-fived Steve.

"Oh that's nasty." Bruce said after transforming back into a human. "What is that?"

Everyone pointed at Tony.

They suddenly heard the mischief god in laughing fits behind them.

Tony turned. "You…" he hissed. He attached the arm of his suit and shot at Loki. Thor suddenly whacked Tony away with his hammer.

"Dude, what the hell?!"

"Do not attack my brother!"

"Watch me." Tony replied. He shot at Loki numerous times, but being the god he is, the bullets and rays barely hurt him.

Thor tackled Tony to the ground but he persisted with his attacks on Loki. Loki smirked.

It's times like these that Tony wishes Pepper was here with her frying pan…

* * *

**A/N**

**Hope you enjoyed it! Please check out my newest story 'Bizarre Beginnings'. Link: s/9322401/1/Bizarre-Beginnings**


	11. I hate rain!

**A/N**

**Sorry for the long wait, I lost inspiration in this story. But never fear, I have found it! :D**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers. I'm sorry but I think I'm going to cry... *sniff***

* * *

Loki lounged on the couch with a book resting on his stomach as Tony stepped out of the elevator soaking wet while carrying a soaked umbrella.

"Ugh, I hate when it rains!" Tony yelled frustratedly before throwing the umbrella down.

An invisible light bulb appeared over Loki's head.

"You should dry off, Stark." Loki said with a sly smile.

"Yeah, I know. I don't need to be told twice." Tony muttered before stalking off to his room.

He returned moments later in dry, warm clothes. Loki smiled again before twisting his hand. A grey cloud appeared over Tony's head which he was yet to notice.

Thunder rumbled in the cloud causing Tony to look up.

"What the fuck?! Why is there a cloud above my head?! Loki!"

"Yes?" Loki asked innocently.

"Get rid of this!" Tony pointed up at the cloud.

"Okay." Loki grumbled. He twisted his hand and rain started to pour out of the cloud.

"Loki! I said get rid of it!"

"Why?"

"Because I'm going to get wet!"

"Why?"

"Because there's rain falling from your cloud!"

"Why?"

"Because you control it!"

"Why?"

"I don't know. Quit stalling and shut it off!"

"Fine." he moaned. He twisted his hand again. Small flashes of light came from the cloud.

"Oh no." Tony muttered.

"Oh yes." Loki said happily.

Small bolts of lightning zapped Tony's head.

"My hair! Why, Loki?"

"Revenge."

"For what? You got me last time so it's technically my turn. You cheated!"

"There are no rules in a war, Stark."

More bolts of lightning hit Tony's head.

"Stop, brother." Thor's voice echoed through the room. The lighting stopped. And so did the thunder.

"Thor!" Loki whined. "I thought you were my ally!"

"I am the god of thunder, brother. I will not tolerate misuse of my babies."

"Your thunder lightning are your 'babies'?" Tony asked, seemingly amused.

"Yes, you have a problem with that?!" Thor boomed.

Loki switched the rain off and destroyed the cloud. He conjured a box of popcorn and watched with an amused expression.

Thor suddenly slammed his hammer into Tony and he flew backwards, hitting the wall.

"Ow." was all Tony could say.

* * *

**A/N**

**Please review, and feel free to check out my other Avengers fics. :D**


	12. My Hair!

**A/N**

**I'd like to thank all my amazing reviewers, 11 chapters and almost 88 reviews! Thanks heaps! This chappie was requested by TheNerdyFangirl. Enjoy.**

* * *

Tony strode into the living area, whistling in attempt to seem nonchalant.

"Hey Loki, what's your least favourite colour?" he asked randomly.

"Pink. Ugh, it is such a vile colour. Why do you inquire?" Loki replied, gagging.

"I'm doing… a survey. Yeah, I need to see which colour is most popular." Tony replied quickly.

Loki narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "As you say, Stark."

* * *

Tony stirred the permanent pink hair dye into the lotion he snatched from the gift basket Thor had received from his mother. He grinned wickedly as the pink colour blended into the lotion more.

"Thor!" he called. The Norse god soon arrived with a few pop tarts in hand. He clapped Tony on the shoulder. "What is it you require, Man of Iron?" he boomed, little pieces of chewed up pop tart flying out of his mouth. One landed on Tony's cheek.

Tony quickly brushed It off after making a disgusted face. "Here is the lotion from your mother's gift basket. There is a note that says it's for Loki." Tony explained, pushing the jar into the god's hands.

"Okay. I shall give this to Loki right away. He loves mother's hair lotion." Thor said, completely oblivious to the fact that this was a part of Tony's scheme.

* * *

Thor marched to Loki, with the container of hair lotion in his hand

"Brother!" he boomed, "There is this wonderful hair lotion mother has sent us. The one you love."

"Ooh, where?" Loki exclaimed, excited.

"Here." Thor pushed the jar into Loki's hands.

Loki threw the cap off the jar and whisked out a handful of the lotion. He slapped it onto his head and began to massage it in.

* * *

_The next morning…_

Loki sat up in his bed. He slowly rolled out and made his way to his mirror to style his hair.

Loki yawned. Well, it started off as a yawn before dissolving into a piercing scream.

His hair was pink. Hot pink.

"THOR!" he screamed.

As always, Thor came into Loki's room happily. "That hair colour, I like it!" he boomed.

"Where _exactly_ did you get the jar of hair lotion?" he demanded, his voice sounded poisonous.

"Man of Iron gave it to me. He said it was from mother's gift basket."

Loki blushed pink, almost as bright as his new hair colour.

Loki let out a loud battle call as he ran for Tony's room.

Tony, however, was ready. He sat on his bed in his Iron Man suit, clutching a large axe.

Loki, seeing this, turned and ran back toward his room.

* * *

**A/N**

**Please review! :D**


	13. 50 Litres of Superglue

**A/N**

**Hey guys, sorry for the long wait. Got a bit caught up with the holidays and Wimbledon. Anyone watching it?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers**

* * *

I bet you're all wondering why Tony would be grinning wildly while holding a bottle of superglue in his hands. Well, Loki had left his helmet lying around and… you get the drift.

Nobody knows why Loki was foolish enough to leave his helmet lying around, especially with a childish Tony Stark seeking vengeance. And nobody really knows why this little war started in the first place.

So Tony was standing in the lab, hunched over the table on which Loki's helmet sat. That's not all. He tightly squeezed the bottle and a _massive_ blob of superglue spurted out into the helmet.

Instead of doing the rational thing any normal person would do and spreading the glue around, he squeezed more superglue into the helmet. Of course, Tony Stark was not normal.

Okay, so maybe Loki didn't leave the helmet lying around. Maybe Tony gassed the room and stole the helmet when Loki was unconscious. Maybe.

After a good ten minutes of squeezing, Tony deposited the umpteenth empty bottle of superglue in to the bin before snatching the helmet from the table and waltzing upstairs. He found Loki sitting on the couch, reading.

Tony tossed the helmet onto Loki's lap. "Hey Reindeer Games, I see you're up. Managed to save you _and_ your helmet from the gas leak. _You're welcome!_" he said, all rather obnoxiously.

Loki, utterly oblivious to the fact that his helmet was rigged, plopped it on his head. You could even hear the sloshing sound of the glue making contact with his head. Curious, Loki tugged his helmet. Nothing.

"Ow, Stark, what did you do to my helmet?!" Loki yelled.

"Uh, it broke and I fixed it?" he tried, "Your welcome?" he tried again.

"STARK!" Loki advanced toward the billionaire. His hand shot toward Tony's neck but he ducked away in time. He ran away waving his arms wildly and screaming "Frosty's angry! Run away! Save yourselves!"

Loki stood there, irritated. "You infuriate me!" he called after Tony. "I will get you for this!"

"Four days…" he muttered.

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**A/N**

**Liked it? Hated it? Tell me in a review. The next one is Loki's revenge. Four days...**


	14. The one with the Mario Kart course

**A/N**

**This one was inspired by DoingItWrite. Thanks for this idea, it was so original and just plain epic!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers or Mario Kart.**

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Why Tony was randomly driving around the city in his brand new Audi remains a mystery to all. But he did, and that's the important thing.

Anyway, it was peak hour and Tony was doing his best weaving through the hectic traffic of New York City. What Tony didn't know was that Loki was watching him from the tower. If you're wondering 'how on earth can Loki see Tony from such a height?' then you should probably know that he's a god, so his abilities instantly overtake those of humans.

Loki smiled wickedly, slightly twisting his hand. Then,

POOF,

the entire city had turned into a level of Mario Kart. Not just any level… well, actually it kind of was. It was every level combined.

Loki smiled darkly again as Tony's car was hit with a lightning bolt and he, along with the car, shrunk.

He tried to avoid anything and everything in his path. He was even afraid to go through bonuses.

Once he and the car had returned to normal size, a squid appeared in front of the windshield and squirted black ink all over it. Tony swerved sharply as he was caught by surprise. Crashing into the fence on the side of the road. Once he was back on the road, with the ink still in his way, he ran over a banana peel, causing him to skid off to the side.

The ink on the windshield finally cleared and Tony drove peacefully… until turtle shells were pelted non-stop at his car. Since Tony had been driving with the top down, some shells hit him in the head. While trying to dodge all the shells, Tony lost control of the wheel. He swerved and headed straight toward a rainbow road. Once on it, he was going at a high speed and no boundaries. Still without control of the wheel, Tony's car took a turn and drove toward a waterfall. Why there was a waterfall randomly in the middle of the city, nobody knows. Except for maybe the creators of Mario Kart.

Next thing he knew, his car was flying down toward jagged rocks at the bottom of the waterfall. Then,

POOF,

Tony's car landed back on the normal streets of the Big Apple. Only his car was battered and ruined, he was covered in bruises and a few drops of squid ink.

He sped into the basement of Stark Tower and wasted no time hunting down the trickster god who he knew was behind this.

Tony stalked up to Loki, lifting him up by the collar. Tony's face was red and you could tell he was so mad that if he were a cartoon character, steam would shoot out of his ears.

"A little bruised, Stark?" Loki said mockingly, laughing but slightly choking under Tony's grip.

"You're clever, I'll give you that. Just wait, and you'll get what's coming." Tony threatened menacingly. He released his grip on Loki before stalking to the bathroom to get cleaned up.

Loki was going to pay BIG TIME for destroying Tony's car.

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**A/N**

**That was so much fun writing! If you guys have and whacky suggestions like this one then please let me know. :)**


	15. Itchy, itchy!

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers**

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Tony rubbed his hands together with a devilish grin plastered on his face. He sprinkled some clear powder into Loki's underwear draw. He kept shaking his hand until the entire shaker was empty. And before you ask, yes, this was itchy powder. Tony was running out of ideas, so he had resorted to his own little creation that he had concocted a while ago. It's quite a funny story, actually. Tony was aiming to create his own home-made salt for Pepper to use, but when Clint had screwed with Tony's substances, changing the labels of everything and such, Tony had used the wrong formula. So when Pepper had attempted to cook with this salt, a massive rash had appeared on her entire body.

So instead of binning his entire supply of the powder, like Pepper had yelled at him to, Tony decided it might be useful in the future, like getting his revenge on the hawk or perhaps using it in this war against Loki. And the powder had proved useful in this situation.

Tony heard the shower door shut in Loki's bathroom, and it was a signal for him to get the fudge outta there. He quickly and quietly closed Loki's underwear drawer and then ran for his life out of the room.

Loki walked out of the attached bathroom to his bedroom, wrapped in a towel. Since there was no known threat about to arise, Loki was going to wear mortal clothing. After all, he was in Midgard. He opened his underwear and pulled out a random pair of undies. He put them on, not noticing the powder. He then slid on a pair of jeans and threw on a t-shirt to complete the look. He tossed his towel into the hamper before making his way to the living room. That was when the powder began to kick in.

First, being the almighty god he is, Loki tried to ignore the itch. But because Tony had gone all out with the powder and poured the entire bloody supply into the drawer, the itching grew more and more by the second. Loki began to scratch the source of the itching: his crotch. Tony was hiding behind the couch, trying his best to maintain his laughter.

Then the itching began to spread down to Loki's legs and feet, hands and arms, his chest and back, and his neck and head. Loki began to scratch his legs through his jeans, and then his arms, then his body and finally his head. But this wasn't enough, nor could he actually scratch successfully through his clothes. So, in a desperate attempt, Loki did the only thing he could think off: throw off all of his clothes and begin to scratch his entire body.

Now he was running around the tower in his underwear and socks, simultaneously scratching different parts of his body.

Now Tony really couldn't contain his laughter. He flipped up his phone and began to film the spectacle.

Oh, this is going onto YouTube, Tony thought, and evil grin forming at his lips.

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**A/N**

**Hey guys, it's been a while, hasn't it? I'm really sorry for the wait and I will try to update more consistently in the future. This chapter was inspired by Rascal (guest). Thanks!**

**Please check out my new Avengers fic 'Reckless'**

**Summary: Hey, my name's Scarlett. People usually call me Scar. You should probably know that I'm in a shit-load of trouble. Yay for me. Okay, so maybe stealing a huge hammer (which no one besides Thor, the god of thunder, should be able to lift) wasn't the smartest thing to do on my part, but hey, you only live once, right?**


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